And it wasn't even on purpose. Heidi had nothing against his preferences in principle, and tried expand her boundaries with him whenever she felt up to trying, but it always resulted in uncomfortable failure. Once, she had even taken the initiative of ordering some rope, not realizing that John already had more than plenty, and she'd never forget the excitement on his face when she told him she wanted to try letting him tie her up. As soon as she felt the rope around her wrists, however, something twisted up inside her, and instead of having mind-blowing sex she instead had a panic attack.On the whole, it sucked, because in practically every other way she felt like she wanted to spend the rest of her life with this man. If there were a pill she could take to somehow turn her into John's perfect girlfriend, she'd down it in a heartbeat.Which was why Heidi had purchased the F.E.T.I.S.H. Ray. She'd seen it on the news, and while she was genuinely appalled at the endless videos of women. Uhm, are you okay? With me being here?" she asked shyly.He turned to Jane reached out his hand and placed it on her arm and said with a fair amount of shock in his voice, "What a thing to ask. I'm glad your here." The words just came out of nowhere. Even if he knew what he was going to say he truly believed that there was no way he could have stopped saying it. And in that moment, deep down within himself, he knew what Jane meant to him, and all of his fear left him. Except for one small piece."It's just that, you haven't talked to me or even, looked at me."Patrick could now add the emotion shame to the fear he felt. Time to be honest. "You're right Jane, I'm sorry. I, just didn't know how to act. It was stupid of me I know, but, well, I'm sorry." The last was said in hope that Jane wouldn't delve further into his answer, he was too far into it than what he was prepared to talk about.Jane placed her hand on his and smiled. "You don't have to say you're sorry. To be honest, I wasn't.
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